greygirlbeast (greygirlbeast) wrote,

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looking for my ON switch again

Get the frell out of here, January. I'm sick to death of you.

No, really. Go. Now.

I spent three or four hours yesterday trying to begin the preface for To Charles Fort, With Love. In the end, I'd spat up only 381 words, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to scrap them and start over again this afternoon. I'd not expected this to be difficult. I really can't afford to give it more than another day or two. Other things have to be written. Upon reflection, I suspect that this preface is proving difficult for two reasons: 1) it begins by trying to examine my fascination with Charles Fort, which is complex, and 2) I spend so much time writing about myself directly these days, in LJ/Blog, that sitting down to do so formally, for publication, feels kind of weird. I've not done anything like this since I wrote my preface for the Subterranean Press edition of Low Red Moon (which should ship within the next week, by the way), and that was way the frell back in March 2003. My plan for today is to stop whenever I get stuck and write an afterword for one of the stories. That way, I'll not only give myself a chance to unlock, but I'll also get some of those afterwords written. It all has to be done. The order in which it gets done doesn't matter.

This is one of the hardest parts of this whole ridiculous writing gig. The empty days, when I have been writing continuously for weeks, and I have to keep writing, even though I feel there's nothing left to say. Nothing at all. Spooky says I'm a bottomless well of words, but that's not true. Right now, I'm standing on dry stone at the bottom of the well. I've been bleeding it dry (did I just mix a metaphor, or merely extend a metaphor oddly?), and it's time to step back and allow the aquifer to seep in again and refill it. But there isn't time for that. People are thirsty. Deadlines must be met. Bills must be paid. Art should never be a slave to commerce, but for all working artists that's exactly what it must be.

We never did lose power, and now the ice is gone.

This round of eBay is almost done. There are only a very few things remaining up. Please check out the auctions. There's a copy of Murder of Angels, a copy of From Weird and Distant Shores, and an ARC of The Dry Salvages. These are the last auctions will have until sometime in February, perhaps even March. Avail yourself.

I'm wasting words. Later.

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