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Yesterday, I wrote an absolutely pathetic 511 words, which may or may not be viable, and I'm left wondering who will murder me first, my agent or my editor. Either way, they would be rendering upon my person a spot of mercy. To quote the astoundingly sexy and well-armed Zoe Washburne.

It wasn't a good day. The best I can say is that it didn't become a violently bad day.


It isn't often I say, "Go forth ye pilgrims and read THIS!" But, if you haven't, you should have a look at José Oliver and Bartolo Torres' Young Lovecraft. I've just finished the first collection, but I believe much of the strip is online. It's like Peanuts for creepy people, with just a dash of perversion. My thanks to oldfossil59 for introducing me to the comic. By the way, I'm actually a much greater admirer of comic "strips" than I am of comic books and graphic novels.


Approximately 30% of the snag in yesterday's writing was my inability to locate a certain passage in A Midsummer Night's Dream. Finally, I put down my Riverside Shakespeare and resorted to the interwebs. Still no luck, but I did discover a remarkable peculiarity. This following sentence recurs perhaps hundreds of times on perhaps hundreds of websites, beginning (for me) with Wikipedia:

Disassociating himself from such evils may be why Oberon, in A Midsummer Night's Dream, carefully observed that neither he nor his court feared the church bells.

It's never sourced, though I believe Wikipedia attributes the sentiment/observation to some or another book on fairies. I'd call this an astounding instance of plagiarism, but we are talking about the internet.


Anyway, if you've not yet ordered a copy of Confessions of a Five-Chambered Heart, or, for that matter, The Drowning Girl: A Memoir, well, why the hell are you hanging around here. I mean, um, please do. Order them. Thank you.

In closing, today's advice: Everyone is out to fuck you over, and never dare believe otherwise.

Aunt Beast


Aug. 12th, 2012 06:07 pm (UTC)
500 words may feel wimpy to you, but I have had freshman comp students weep at the idea.
Aug. 12th, 2012 06:08 pm (UTC)

Then they should be flogged and forced to try harder.
Aug. 12th, 2012 06:14 pm (UTC)
Sadly, the first wasn't an option.
Though I'd have been waaaay for it for the ones who plagiarized from Cliff Notes or the introduction to the assigned texts.
(Not only didn't you write it, but you didn't een cheat right.)
Lots of hand holding otherwise.
Words can be just scary.
Aug. 12th, 2012 06:16 pm (UTC)

(Not only didn't you write it, but you didn't een cheat right.)

This is why we punch people in their ears! That's like getting a D-. Not even being able to fail properly.

And now I will spend the day thinking of holding severed hands.

Aug. 12th, 2012 07:34 pm (UTC)
And now I will spend the day thinking of holding severed hands.

HaveTom Lehrer. Everyone should.