What gets me is that I absolutely refused to allow myself to believe that John Kerry had any chance of winning this election, and yet, this morning, I still feel like someone has sucker punched me in the gut. It seems no matter how little faith I grant the human race, it's will always be capable of astounding and disappointing me. There seems to be no self-defence against hope. MSNBC just posted the news that Kerry has conceded, so it's over, kiddos, and we have four more years of G. W. in the White House and four more years of whatever hell that includes. But beyond the fact of Bush as President I think there are more disturbing messages to be learned from this election. I'm not yet entirely certain how to formulate or express most of them, but I can see that they're there. Is it the end of the world, Bush winning this election? No, but it is definitely another step in the right direction — if world ending is what this species is destined for, and I can see no substantial evidence to the contrary.
Isn't there something ironic in the fact that the vast majority of the cities most in danger of future terrorist attacks — New York, D.C., Los Angeles, Chicago, Seattle, Boston, etc. — went to Kerry, while all the South and all those "heartland" states went to Bush, who claims to be our best defence against terrorism? Clearly, he hasn't made those most at risk feel any safer.
Meanwhile, eleven states have voted to amend their constitutions to forbid same-sex marriage, and all these amendments passed by double-digit margins. The bigots carry the day.
I can't think about this too much today. Maybe tomorrow. Today I have to think about work and moving and being in Minneapolis in eight days. I have to speak with my agent in NYC and with Subterranean Press and with an editor at Marvel. I have work to do, and everything I see and hear is making me sicker to my stomach, sicker to my soul. Time to stop looking and listening for a little while.