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"I am Caitlin's aging uterus."

I think Spooky and I just unintentionally wrote a Muppet sex ed film. And I'm afraid those images will be with me forever.

Yesterday, well...yesterday was a very strange writing day. I sat down to get back to work on "The Maltese Unicorn." I read over what had been written so far, and suddenly the whole thing felt terribly off kilter. For starters, I was only a third of the way into the story, at best, and yet I was about halfway to the maximum word count. Truthfully, as the story was being written, the way I was writing it, it wanted to be a 30,000-word novella. It has to be, instead, a 10,000 word short story. The biggest problem was the frame, set at the Drancy Transit Camp outside of Paris in 1941, six years after the events of the story proper. When I began work on the story, I thought the frame was necessary. But suddenly it seemed utterly superfluous. Worse, the front end of the frame had already devoured almost 2,000 words, and there would still be the back end of the frame to cope with at the end of the story. I knew that would need, at minimum, another 500 words.

I spent about an hour talking to Spooky— well, it was more like ranting madly at Spooky —trying desperately to figure out how to "fix" the story as quickly and efficiently as possible. And, finally, I made the decision to, in essence, decapitate it. Lop off the frame, the first section, then surgically remove all references back to the frame. I have never really done anything of this sort, and it's an understatement to say I found it terrifying. This morning, it's still terrifying. Late yesterday, I shortened the story by about 2,500 words, and smoothed away most of the rough edges left by the edit. I read it through to Spooky again, and it seemed to work better— though the tone had been altered, and the story was suddenly not nearly so dark as it had been (not a good thing). Today, I'm going to sit down and expand the opening paragraphs, restoring some of the set up that was originally in the "frame" section, before proceeding with that part of the story (the middle and ending) that has yet to be written.

Please have a look at the current eBay auctions. Thanks.

Last night, we watched the new episode of Glee. It's the first episode that really hasn't worked for me. Too many "what the fuck" moments, and it wasn't the good sort of "what the fuck." It was more the sort that left me wanting to wash my brain. Though, Brittany wearing her cheerleader uniform backwards, that almost made up for it. Oh, and Sue Sylvester. Later, I finished reading the graphic-novel adaptation of "The Call of Cthulhu," illustrated by Michael Zigerlig (with an introduction by H.R. Giger).

Comments

( 16 comments — Have your say! )
sovay
Jun. 3rd, 2010 04:53 pm (UTC)
I think Spooky and I just unintentionally wrote a Muppet sex ed film. And I'm afraid those images will be with me forever.

. . . thanks for sharing.

And, finally, I made the decision to, in essence, decapitate it. Lop off the frame, the first section, then surgically remove all references back to the frame. I have never really done anything of this sort, and it's an understatement to say I found it terrifying.

Does it feel as though you might go back and re-expand it at some point, like the two versions of "Salammbô Redux"?
greygirlbeast
Jun. 3rd, 2010 05:01 pm (UTC)

Does it feel as though you might go back and re-expand it at some point, like the two versions of "Salammbô Redux"?

I don't know. Right now, I just want to get it written.
sovay
Jun. 3rd, 2010 05:06 pm (UTC)
Right now, I just want to get it written.

Fair enough.
robyn_ma
Jun. 3rd, 2010 05:54 pm (UTC)
'I think Spooky and I just unintentionally wrote a Muppet sex ed film.'

This surprises precisely no one.

'And I'm afraid those images will be with me forever.'

As well they should be.
greygirlbeast
Jun. 3rd, 2010 05:55 pm (UTC)

This surprises precisely no one.

Alas, I feared it wouldn't.
robyn_ma
Jun. 3rd, 2010 06:12 pm (UTC)
It would surprise even fewer people if Owl and I did the same.

I believe that the couples who last are the ones who unintentionally write Muppet sex ed films, or things of that nature. Surreal silliness is not to be underappreciated in a relationship.
chris_walsh
Jun. 4th, 2010 02:29 pm (UTC)
Agreed indeed. "Love should have a sense of humor" might be the truest thing I've yet written.
robyn_ma
Jun. 3rd, 2010 06:14 pm (UTC)
Just now: 'That's what happens when you take a guitar pick and put it in a can of tuna fish.'

...Don't ask.
(Deleted comment)
greygirlbeast
Jun. 3rd, 2010 07:09 pm (UTC)

Did it feel wrong to go back through and take out the frame and references once you were doing it, or did it feel like you were lifting a weight off?

Mostly, it felt completely disorienting, like driving backwards.
nightwitch
Jun. 3rd, 2010 08:00 pm (UTC)
I started watching Glee because of the comments you've made about it here, and now it's become one of my favorite shows.....Sue Sylvester is hilarious. Thanks for the recommendation.
fusijui
Jun. 3rd, 2010 10:22 pm (UTC)
I'm eagerly anticipating a followup post, "This is Caitlin's aging uterus on drugs". If I still had one myself it'd probably be hooked on smack by now. Or else a mean drunk.

I'm sort of glad to hear about the ruthless surgery of "The Maltese Unicorn". Too much literary in my noir waters it down. Prefer it neat. Isn't noir already kind of the pretentious older brother of pulp, that went off to college for a year and read some Sartre?
greygirlbeast
Jun. 3rd, 2010 10:26 pm (UTC)

Prefer it neat. Isn't noir already kind of the pretentious older brother of pulp, that went off to college for a year and read some Sartre?

Not a bad description.
(Deleted comment)
greygirlbeast
Jun. 4th, 2010 12:04 am (UTC)
Re: Aging

funny, as you've discussed it, it seemed as if you were describing a (possibly) longer work.

Yeah, the greatest challenge seems to be telling is as a short story.
chris_walsh
Jun. 4th, 2010 02:41 pm (UTC)
Randomly, if you feel like reading,
you might get a kick out of rm. She does academic writing and is not afraid to be all ZOMYGOD YOU GUYS THIS IS COOL. Like when she saw a Cirque du Soleil show and said "Three words about Ovo: omnisexual bug porn. One more word? AWESOME. Also, adorable food juggling ants! I know a lot of people who are sort of cynical about Cirque, but it's really, really different in person than if you've watched it on TV. It is funny and sexy and often fairly tense (there's always one trick you expect to have a net or a safety rope that doesn't and *shudder*)." In other words, both wicked smart and enthusiastic.

She also recently said that she wished academic papers allowed the use of the phrase "they're only in it for the lulz," because she was writing about online culture and that was the more succinct way to express something than academe-ese.

rm also also acts, analyzes the pluses and minuses of Buffy and Angel (she's working through both series right now), experiences New York in a way that's teaching me stuff, and writes about LGBT issues in a way that's really teaching me stuff. Anyway, you might find rm worth reading.
mckenzie34
Jun. 4th, 2010 05:12 pm (UTC)
Shit. As if having "Hello Kitty Nipple Clamps" forever floating
like satellite detritus in my mental atmosphere wasn't enough,
now there's "Muppet Sex Ed".

Re: Your mood, the oil slick-- everyfuckingthing. It's
all gone rather Jenny Finn, hasn't it.
( 16 comments — Have your say! )