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You know your insomnia has wrought unspeakable ill upon your person, when your girlfriend forbids you to look in mirrors. I got to sleep sometime between 2:30 and 3:00 ayem, then woke at 8:45. After hardly sleeping the night before. And I was a lot more awake at 8:45 than I am right now.

Yesterday, I wrote 1,005 words on what I hope to fuck all is the beginning of "As Red as Red." I'm running out of month. And I still have Sirenia Digest #40 to get out, when this short story is finished.


My disdain for the Sci Fi Channel is no secret. After the cancellation of Farscape, I refused to watch for a year or two, then only went back for Battlestar Galactica and Doctor Who (the latter is not actually a SciFi produced series, of course). The former SFC vice-president, Bonnie Hammer, went so far out of her way to alienate the channel's core market, and launched such insulting attacks on the people tuning in...well, I wasn't sure it could get much worse. Wrong. Which is to say, "Sci Fi Channel Aims to Shed Geeky Image With New Name." Yes, the SciFi Channel will now be the SyFy channel. And you know why? In the words of Dave Howe, president of the Sci Fi Channel:

When we tested this new name, the thing that we got back from our 18-to-34 techno-savvy crowd, which is quite a lot of our audience, is actually this is how you’d text it. It made us feel much cooler, much more cutting-edge, much more hip, which was kind of bang-on what we wanted to achieve communication-wise.

So, there you have it, kiddos. Ys are quantitatively cooler than Is. I suppose this means that it's time to change my name to Caytlyn R. Kyernan, so I can be so much cooler and more cutting edge and txty and all that shit. Anyway, you should read this article. It'll make your brain cramp. I think David Howe actually makes me miss Bonnie Hammer.


Speaking of things that make your brain cramp, let's say you were to join a Second Life roleplay group with the following charter:

"We are seekers into the mystery, dedicated to the discovery, rediscovery, and preservation of ancient and occult knowledge. We serve no master or mistress but this one purpose. In all matters concerning the world beyond the AI, we maintain a stance of inviolable and absolute neutrality. We do not take sides. We do not offer aid or shelter. We do not interfere. We are one and many. We seek the Truth, and shall hold no creed nor take any action contrary to our mission."

Now, having joined, having read that charter for such an esoteric and clearly self-centered order, would you then dare feel somehow justified at expressing righteous indignation upon learning that the group doesn't take sides, or offer aid or shelter? That it doesn't help blind old ladies cross streets, or sell cookies to send kids with special needs to summer camp, or run a kennel for stray dogs, or give good homes to fucking orphans? Oh, and do keep in mind that the order's founder is a vampire hailing from the Tzmisce sect, and, in earlier times, she was known as Countess Báthory Erzsébet, and La bête du Gévaudan, and Jack the Ripper? Never mind that she might also have been responsible for the Tunguska explosion in 1908 (and yeah, those last two sentences are surely geektastic enough to send David Howe of the SyFy Channel running for cover, lest he be stricken with unhip, unsalable paroxysms of mortal fucking agony). I'm just asking, you know? Because my tolerance for stupid is scraping bottom this morning.

Is it just me, or are people far less ashamed of looking foolish than they once were? I think it's becoming a badge of honour.


Please have a look at the new ebay auctions. We have a copy of The Five of Cups up, and keep in mind, this is one of the last of these I have to sell. Thanks.

Tomorrow I am banning all Is from this blog. Because, you know, then I'll be, like, way cooler. And make more money. And stuff.

Oh...I have some more photos from our trip to the Common Burying Ground in Newport on Monday:

All Photographs Copyright © 2009 by Kathryn A. Pollnac


Mar. 18th, 2009 04:50 pm (UTC)
When I was heading home from work yesterday, I realized that the Skiffy Channel's name change made perfect sense. After all, it's a longstanding tradition for companies infamous for toxic products to change their names to something that isn't already a profanity and hope that this is all they need to do. Phillip Morris changed its name to Altria. Blackwater changed its name to Xe. The Chicago Archdiocese changed its name to "NAMBLA". It happens all the time.

What's funny is that by choosing a name that's Polish for syphilis, SyFy only managed to exceed one other company for stupidity above and beyond the call of duty. Back a decade ago, Andersen Technical Consulting had done such a good job of building a reputation for ripping off clients (the billions Andersen stole from FoxPro nearly murdered the company) that it split off Andersen Consulting from the technical division. Andersen kept its name, and went on to various atrocities at Enron, but the new tech company went by the name of...Accenture. The fact that most people who've dealt with Accenture reps or recruiters refer to it as "Ass-Enter"? Pure coincidence.
Mar. 18th, 2009 06:14 pm (UTC)
"The Chicago Archdiocese changed its name to "NAMBLA". It happens all the time."

*dies laughing*
You are hilarious. ^_^
Mar. 18th, 2009 06:17 pm (UTC)
Well, you know that old South Park episode where Mr. Garrison was furious with his father for never having been molested? I start to wonder how I was the only altar boy in Chicago who escaped unscathed. Am I that ugly?
Mar. 18th, 2009 06:30 pm (UTC)
That episode was hysterical.

A friend of mine was introduced to his finacee's family's priest and the priest asked him if he'd ever been an altar boy. My friend said it took every ounce of willpower he had NOT to reply: "Are you hitting on me??"

Mar. 18th, 2009 08:05 pm (UTC)
When I was first dating my ex-wife, my future in-laws had issues with me. This was right about the time of the West Memphis Three trials, so they saw I had black hair long enough to sit on and assumed that I was a Satanist. The day before our wedding, they called and asked if they could bring anything to the wedding, and it took every last bit of my self-control not to say "A bushel basket full of black candles and a fresh goat's head."
Mar. 19th, 2009 05:03 pm (UTC)
lol! That would have been hysterical, and very ill-advised. ^_^

*giggle* omg, can you just picture their reaction?
Mar. 19th, 2009 05:13 pm (UTC)
Oh, I have an idea. My father's side of the family is very viciously Catholic, and my paternal grandmother has spoken maybe three dozen civil words to my mother in the last 44 years. I was written out of the will in 1985 for two particular incidents, the first being that I celebrated my nineteenth birthday by catching the local premiere of George Romero's Day of the Dead. (My grandmother apparently still has pattern nightmares from watching James Whale's Frankenstein in 1932, so she wasn't amused at my cheering on the zombies in the slightest.) The other was when she started nagging me about when I was going to settle down and get married, and I snapped back "Oh, when I find a nice Jewish girl."

The real irony? She doesn't know yet that I kept my promise.