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Addendum: Distraction

Here's a "meme" (behind the cut) I just found in robyn_ma's LJ, because the words aren't coming, the ideas aren't coming, and I have to waste the next ten minutes somehow...



1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode, so who would you blow up?

Likely, I would spend the next twenty-five years dithering over who has it coming the most....

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Who is that?

See my reply to the first question.

3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

I see a pattern forming here. Beyond that, I think there are maybe 5.75 billion or so people who are equally deserving.

4. What is your favorite cheese?

Roquefort.

5. You can only have one kind of sandwich and every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind do you make?

Hot pastrami on rye.

6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex, and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?

Tilda Swinton.

7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick?
See above.

Bjork.

8. Now that you've slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a $100 bill on the sidewalk. What do you buy?

Two or three bottles of really good tequila.

9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

London.

10. An angel appears out of heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the beverage of your choice. It is...?

Though I believe neither in Heaven nor in angels...and, in fact, I cannot imagine why an angel would be dispensing free beverages...never mind.

12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anywhere in the PAST. Where do you go?

Who the fuck is Rufus?

13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

No humans.

14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called?

Futility.


15. What is your favorite curse word?

Fuck.

16. One night, you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, what do you do?

....I've never had sex with mummies...

17. Your house is on fire! What do you do?

Hold on. I'm still thinking about the mummies.

18. The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?

Well, the author of this "meme" gets points for referring to an angel (in which I do not believe) with a gender-neutral pronoun, but loses points over "Whatcha gonna" and hyphenating "half hour" when it is not being used as a compound adjective. But, to answer the question, sit with Spooky on a lonely rocky beach somewhere.

19. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What super-power is it?

Omnipotence, which makes my choices on questions 1-3 much easier.

20. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

Pass. Next question.

21. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

Life.

22. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check this out...you can move to anywhere else in the world. Where?

A self-referential "meme." How precious. France.

23. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. If you were banned from every bar in the world except one, which one would it be?

The Globe, Athens, Georgia.

24. Hopefully you didn't mention this in the super-powers question...If you did, then we'll just expand on that. Check it out…you've suddenly gained the ability to fly! Whose house are you going to fly to first, and say "Check it out…I can FLY!"

Unlike this "meme's" author, I do not say, "Check it out."

25. The constant absorption of magical moon beams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous person of your choice. Which celebrity will you bring back to life?

Well, since I'm already omnipotent...oh, screw it. I pass on this one, too.

Comments

( 9 comments — Have your say! )
albionidaho
Nov. 4th, 2007 07:44 pm (UTC)
(Deleted comment)
soless
Nov. 4th, 2007 10:06 pm (UTC)
This time with proper formatting...
Did you two miss the late '80s? Rufus revealed: here (imdb link).
soless
Nov. 4th, 2007 10:08 pm (UTC)
Re: This time with proper formatting...
And now I bother to go and read the other comments. Sorry. *sticks head in hole*
greygirlbeast
Nov. 4th, 2007 10:34 pm (UTC)
Re: This time with proper formatting...

Did you two miss the late '80s?

Those tapes were erased in the great purge and reboot of 1994.
soless
Nov. 5th, 2007 07:40 am (UTC)
Re: This time with proper formatting...
Not that I blame you, but come on! Bill and Ted's adventures shaped the course of many a playground imagination battle for me.

"I got you."
"No you didn't."
"Yes I did. I'm going to go back in my time machine and get you before you can get away."
setsuled
Nov. 4th, 2007 10:36 pm (UTC)
7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick?
See above.

Bjork.


That's a really good choice. She just seems built for it, and I sense she'd have the right attitude.

13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

No humans.


You have got to see The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya some time.
robyn_ma
Nov. 4th, 2007 11:40 pm (UTC)
Oh, fuck, did you have to mention you got the meme from me? Because now, if at dinner tomorrow Spooky does her killer impersonation of Alan Rickman's orgasm sounds and you laugh and choke on your spaetzle and die, all the fans will blame me for making you fritter away time on a stupid meme you got from my LJ when you could have been writing Joey Lafaye and they'll hunt me down and I'll have to move to Toronto and I don't have a road atlas for Toronto.

So, please: don't eat spaetzle.

Also, like, it's like totally mortifying that you of all people even look at my LJ because I just post stupid stuff on there like panda bears on slides and bizarre things the cats do and I forget that Caitlín R. 'I Write Awesomeness' Kiernan might occasionally look at this shit and I'll just be under the bed with a paper bag over my head.
sfmarty
Nov. 5th, 2007 12:09 am (UTC)
Hmmm, Robyn Ma hs a panda bear blog. Hmmm.

As for the meme, 80s??? (wince)
able_spacer
Nov. 5th, 2007 04:42 am (UTC)
Greetings!

My wife just finished and enjoyed your new Beowulf book (I'll be taking a turn on it now).

I'll introduce myself properly via email, so you won't be puzzled over being friended by some oddball with a wiggly-fingered avatar.

Thanks!
( 9 comments — Have your say! )