March 16th, 2007


Howard Hughes — Girl Taxidermist!

So, Mr. Jerry Franklin of House, New Mexico got me to thinking. Just how foul is the language in Threshold? Limiting myself to the following instances, I did some quick calculations:

Jesus (used as an expletive): 38
goddamn (any form thereof): 71
god (used as an expletive): 10
fuck (any form thereof): 127
shit (any form thereof): 95

Total: 341

And I thought, thought I, goddamn, that's a fucking lot of swear words. But then Spooky came along and calculated what percentage these 341 words constitute of the total word count of the novel. Turns out, it's a mere .317%, which left me feeling somewhat disappointed, like I'm not trying hard enough. I mean, Mr. Franklin accused me of having "every character in the book curse Gods Name [sic] every ten words or so," and now I feel like I've really gone and let him down. Indeed, I could find no clear instance of anyone cursing "Gods Name," not even once in more than a hundred thousand words. Moreover, near as I can tell, Dancy never utters a single swear of any sort. Clearly, I must strive to write a dirtier novel.

Not much to say for yesterday. I reformatted "A Season of Broken Dolls" and sent it to Subterranean Press, which took longer than I'd expected. I did a last polish/edit on the Locus article and sent it in. I answered a lot of e-mail. It was that sort of day. I went to Videodrome and Whole Foods with Spooky, and then she made one of her very fine pizzas with loads of fresh garlic and basil. I was in the mood for Big Dumb Action, so we watched Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor's Crank and Prachya Pinkaew's Tom yum goong (aka, The Protector). Both were deeply, absurdly satisfying films, given I was in that sort of mood where I craved unapologetic violence and the meting out of merciless, bloody, screaming vengeance. Tony Jaa amazes me (and I loved the Jackie Chan cameo). So, yeah, that was yesterday.

I think that's it for now. The platypus is whispering in my ear...